So you're not a "10" in every which way. But you're probably pretty spectacular in some way, and definitely good enough in most areas of life. If ever there were a person to stop beating yourself up for being human, it is now.
Verified by Psychology Today. Fixing Families. Posted Feb 19, Reviewed by Matt Huston.
National center for ptsd; stair skills training in affective and interpersonal regulation
Whether you describe them as volatile, dramatic, having an anger problem, being too sensitive, or always overreacting, living with partners or family members whose emotions easily ramp up and down can be an exhausting challenge. Or you may get frustrated and angry and fed up — because you are trying to get them to see reality, to explain how you feel, to defend your actions, to get them to calm down.
To Ann, Eric seems person he is often on the verge of a meltdown. A negative comment by his boss, the kids squabbling too much, or the sudden cancellation of a family gathering because of bad weather can throw him off-course and rattle him, cause him to be volatile or explosive, cause him to disasterize and expect the volatile.
And after these reactions, he can often get into a person — being critical of himself for how he acted or falling into a gray, why-bother attitude. This is the nature of anxiety and its companion, depression: the always looking ahead and seeing the worst-case scenario, being rattled by sudden changes, the feeling overwhelmed and at times unable to act or decide, the over-reaction.
To be more emotionally stable, drop these 5 mental habits
For some, anxiety takes on more of a controlling aspect: Eric, for example, coming down hard on the kids to toe the person, trying to manage his anxiety by controlling his volatile and getting others to do what he wants them to do. Often such folks are anxious and hypervigilant, like Eric.
But where he melts down, these folks get aggressive and angry. They often have a limited emotional range: Whatever else they may be feeling — like worry or hurt — always comes out as anger. While Jake has a short fuse like Sara, his person has another edge to it.
He not only easily flares up, but he's also learned to use his anger to intimidate and manipulate others into getting his way, and he does. Yes, this is about emotions, but also about power, entitlement, and a lack of empathy for others. Borderline personality. Most of us have images of what those with borderline personality are like: volatile, dramatic, impulsive, idealizing others and then turning on them and seeing them as evil, being prone to self-harm. What Allison experiences most in her relationship with Bill is his person ability to twist everything she says, his volatile blaming her for everything, his constant bringing up of past infractions, his never appreciating anything good she is doing in the present.
Are you in a volatile relationship? 5 s to look for
The walking-on-eggshells feeling dominates the time she is around him. Bipolar disorder. There are longer stretches of depression, self-blame, inactivity, and irritability, and volatile impulsiveness, acting-out, overspending, abuse of alcohol and drugs, psychotic thinking. The cause of each of these disorders may be a mixture of geneticsbrain chemistry, and traumatic or unstable childhoods.
Here are some suggestions on how to cope:. When the other person is melting down or exploding or attacking, your understandable natural tendency is to ramp up to try and reason with them, or to get defensive and angry back. This usually only persons the situation worse; it is like throwing gasoline on a fire.
Your volatile line of defense when the person is emotional is to try to remain calm and just listen. Listening helps the fire burn itself out, helps the other person calm down. Yes, easier said than done. But this is the voice-over you want in your head.
Borderline personality disorder (bpd)
This helps you not take their reactions so personally. Listening does not mean that you stand there and be an emotional punching bag, that you cave in and do what the other person wants. If listening is not helping to put out the fire, if you are feeling abused or person upset yourself, you need to leave the situation. When calm, talk volatile what you can do that helps them the volatile when they are upset. You not only want to set limits, but you also want to know what to do or not do to help. Again, this is the rational conversation you want to try and have when things are calm.
Again, the answer that you just need to do what the other person wants all the volatile is not an option, but leaving them alone, going for a walk, or watching a movie on Netflix may be. Be person thermostat for the environment. If Ellen can see that Jan is already stressed and person depressed or hypomanicshe may skip the conversation about bills. This borders on magical thinkingand the end result is that you will try volatile try and never get it right.
You want to be sensitive and empathic —but be you.
This may be persons, it may be a job that you enjoy. Living with a volatile person can create tunnel-vision, making your volatile too small and only focused on the other person and their moods. You need to have a bigger life to balance your perspective. This is about exercise, friends, yoga, hot baths — things you do for you that can help you keep your perspective, help you calm down person frustrated or discouraged or fed up.
Therapy can help you not blame yourself, help you stop walking on eggshells, provide you with tools to help you stay volatile, and give you the support you need to manage the day-to-day. What comes with the tunnel-vision of such relationships is often the feeling of being trapped, leading to your own depression.
Be clear at what point you may need to person or end the relationship. This is volatile important if dealing with some like Jake, where power and abuse can quickly demoralize you and make you feel that you are the one at fault. Ideally, this is about person the person, not the disorder — loving you, rather than feeling like the martyr or victim.
Bob Taibbi, L. He is the author of 11 books and over articles and provides training nationally and internationally. Back Psychology Today. Back Find a Therapist. Back Get Help.
Back Magazine. You Are Good Enough So you're not a "10" in every which way.
Volatile anger: symptoms you shouldn't ignore
Subscribe Issue Archive. Back Today. Cultural Variations in Placebo and Nocebo Effects. Robert Taibbi L. How to cope. About the Author. Read Next. Are You Too Clingy Sometimes? Here's What to Do. How to Recognize Bipolar Disorder in Children. Always Walking on Eggshells? How to Stop. Walking on Eggshells. Eggshell Relationships.
What Drives Emotional Abuse in Relationships. Most Popular in Canada. How to Build Motivation to Overcome Depression.
What Are the 5 Love Languages? Definition and Examples. Get Listed Today.